Sitting here waiting to get laid off....

My company recently announced that 8% of the workforce would be laid off.

That was shortly followed by my department announcing a 5% reduction in force.

This is about my sixth round of layoffs with this company.

But for some reason this time it is different.  This time I feel my luck has finally run out.

I have no way of knowing but something in my gut tells me I will be sent packing.

It's been two weeks since the announcements and the pink slips will probably be going out soon.

Understandably these last two weeks I have been dealing with a lot of emotions and I find myself for once not wanting to talk about how I feel.

But still in the midst of all the fear there is also excitement.

If I get laid off, will I harness that excitement to search for a job that I really want?

Something I have been wanting for a long time.  Something totally different from what I do today.

Or will the fear of being "60 and unemployed" paralyze me? 

Will I tell myself that a new career at my age is just a joke and to be realistic; that at my age I will be lucky to just get another job in the field I am already in?

This waiting is torture...